Winter melts into Spring.

So it has been warming up here slowly and I couldn't be more relieved. Granted, this winter was not as bad as last winter, I am so tired of the cold and the dark. Days are getting longer and I am having to wear less layers. Which is a plus because I am ready to change from coats to tank tops. Plus, my summer shoes are so much more fun than my winter ones.

I still haven't been getting out a lot. Lately, I haven't been wanting to try much. Sometimes I just don't feel like trying to calm myself down especially when it comes to going out on the weekends. Why spend an hour getting all dolled up to be out for 20 mins and feeling anxious most of the time. Maybe once the warmer weather settles in, I'll be more apt to going out.

I am a bit bummed, Lady Gaga is coming to town this week and my friend offered me a ticket to go with them. I adore Lady Gaga, I think she is fabulous. Her music is fun to dance to and she stands up for what she believes in and her fashion style is her own. I love her. I am very glad that my friend thought to invite me, it's nice to have good friends but it made me very sad to turn it down. Not only is the concert way out of my comfort zone but the thought of being around so many people and having to park so far away, it's just too much.

Which has got me thinking just how much am I going to continue to miss out on because of...myself? It's infuriating. I've passed up trips, concerts, all sorts of opportunities to make wonderful memories or grow closer to those I care about. it just makes me sad.

I am almost 28 and still in the same place I was when I was 18. I still have the same problems. *sigh*

I am working on another pair of shoes though, which I enjoy. I do hope I can make something out of this. I do hope I can make something out of myself. I don't want to be like this in another ten years...